You must be wondering why so many posts in a row and in a day? There is a funny story behind it anyway... I forgot which account i used to post in my old blog. Hence I have to copy into a new one. Note to myself... write somewhere your blog account and password for future reference...
I'm ready to update my next fertility adventure. Till my next post..... TARA....
Wednesday, 12 December 2012
End of ivf 4
Came to the clinic at 8.15 am even though I was asked to come 8 am. I just could not be bothered. I know it won't be A good news anyway. My feeling? I don't know... What should I be feeling right now? Sad, disappointment, loss I don't even get to have my 2ww. Well I don't know maybe Allah has better plan for me. Bit confused now. Nurse asked me to change clothes now i'm wearing OT gown, I did asked her did the egg fertilized , yesterday none fertilized. Owh I wouldn't know anything about that, you would have to ask the lab. What??? I will be rather frustrated strutting down to the OT with only the OT gown n were told none to transfer.... I'm wanted to cry but DH is here. I down him to see how upset I am. I have given a good one hour cry after the embryologist informed me... More update... My blood pressure was skyrocket high and have a bit of temperature. Nurse asked me not to stressed myself out. After she leaved I asked DH how could I not stressed out... Zero fertilization ... Nada... None... My brain has been working overtime...I keep on thinking what is my next step. For me: 1. Lose weight yup I'm obese n I know it 2. Exercise.... Slow n steady I hope, I don't want my heart to have a shock 3. Eat healthily 4. Supplement I even list down what DH supposed to do 1. Drink more water. He hardly drinks water 2. Eat healthily. He likes fast food. 3. Supplement More update: The embryologist came n see me. None fertilized as expected. I asked her what went wrong. She said the egg remained 1 polar body after 48 hours and ICSI. She could not tell what's the problem. Even ICSI was performed by senior embryologist due to only 3 eggs, it could be sperm, egg or both. Arghhhhh headache.... I just want to shout on top of my lung. What is wrong with me. What is wrong with hubby? Can it be fixed. Or if next cycle will yield the same result.
Written Date:7/4/2012
Progress so far
A day after my ER, I saw a missed call from unfamiliar number... My heart been thumping outloud... I guessed this must be bad news from the clinic... Well it was from the embryologist... Out of 5 eggs, 2 were immature, other 3 eggs were icsi but no sign of fertilization... Bummer... I could not believe it's happening again... No fertilization. I guess I produce crappy eggs n DH have crappy sperms. Match made in heaven. I could only pray my children won't have tha same fate as us. She asked us to come to the clinic tomorrow morning anyway in case late fertilization... I don't have high hope... Good news if we did not make it to ET could have rm 3000 refunded. I'll be saving that money for the next cycle (if there will ever be)
Written Date: 6/4/2012
Can I Proceed???
Well this morning I saw Dr Tee again. Me and DH came early to avoid the traffic. 8:30 am and waited in the lounge till 10:15 am... Have another ultrasound and seems:
Uterine lining 12 mm
Left ovary : 4 follicles with sizes range from 18-23mm
Right ovary : finally it's around. 2 follies with size 16-20mm
Other follies is smaller less than 15mm so hopefully they'll grow some more
6 follies.... hope for the best
Next Step:
No more gonal f, burserelin, menosys injection. Apparently Dr said my ovary have enuf.
Tonight : Come back to the clinic for HCG 10,000 iu injection at 10 pm
Friday (6/4/2012) : ER day... 6:30 am at the clinic.
Bit nervous though, my serial coughing is still around. Hope everything went well.
This is the first time i've done IVF without any blood work done during stimming. Maybe less follicles so Dr is not concerned that I'm a potential OHSS candidate.
I've been drinking loads of water, one to prevent OHSS and most importantly i just want to shift the cough away. Good health.
I also plan to take leave whole week next week. This is to avoid stress. It's an hour drive to work. I don't need the stress of facing heavy traffic every day.
Uterine lining 12 mm
Left ovary : 4 follicles with sizes range from 18-23mm
Right ovary : finally it's around. 2 follies with size 16-20mm
Other follies is smaller less than 15mm so hopefully they'll grow some more
6 follies.... hope for the best
Next Step:
No more gonal f, burserelin, menosys injection. Apparently Dr said my ovary have enuf.
Tonight : Come back to the clinic for HCG 10,000 iu injection at 10 pm
Friday (6/4/2012) : ER day... 6:30 am at the clinic.
Bit nervous though, my serial coughing is still around. Hope everything went well.
This is the first time i've done IVF without any blood work done during stimming. Maybe less follicles so Dr is not concerned that I'm a potential OHSS candidate.
I've been drinking loads of water, one to prevent OHSS and most importantly i just want to shift the cough away. Good health.
I also plan to take leave whole week next week. This is to avoid stress. It's an hour drive to work. I don't need the stress of facing heavy traffic every day.
Written Date: 3/4/2012
How it's been feeling lately...
Today is D9 of stimming... There are some pressures down there. First all the aching is more intense on the right side. Since my U/S yesterday and informed by Dr he could not locate follicle/ovary on my right side... Well... the pain seems to dissappear... Physiological only effect.
I was sad... but i have to keep positive for the sake of the rest of my left ovary. Go follicle Go... Grow some good healthy eggies.... Give mommy something to be proud of.
My left side started to have twinges and pressure feeling... So next step... i will only inject on my left side. So all nice hormon will reach faster and better.
DF is 23 mm... Please do not grow so fast let other follicle/eggs grow as well.... Sharing is caring DF..
I was sad... but i have to keep positive for the sake of the rest of my left ovary. Go follicle Go... Grow some good healthy eggies.... Give mommy something to be proud of.
My left side started to have twinges and pressure feeling... So next step... i will only inject on my left side. So all nice hormon will reach faster and better.
DF is 23 mm... Please do not grow so fast let other follicle/eggs grow as well.... Sharing is caring DF..
Written Date 3/4/2012.
Syringe... Needle... Anyone???
Good news...
Due to my panic incidence yesterday, the clinic gave me syringe with short needle ... the stupid needle did not reach even half of the ampoules to draw drug.
So today i visit the clinic, this is one of the positive side working in faculty of medicine with attached specialist clinic (but no fertility facility) . Managed to asked one of the nurse to pass me over a syringe, mixing needle n subcutaneous needle. It's an interchangeable syringe.... So I'm a happy woman. She asked me how many would I want... Of couse sitting back in my fridge is one set of menosys...So i took one.
Update: I feel calmer for my menosys injection last night. The syringe really help. The powder dissolve throughout compared to the day before. I think some of the liquid left in the bottle and i did not get the right dosage as intended.
Due to my panic incidence yesterday, the clinic gave me syringe with short needle ... the stupid needle did not reach even half of the ampoules to draw drug.
So today i visit the clinic, this is one of the positive side working in faculty of medicine with attached specialist clinic (but no fertility facility) . Managed to asked one of the nurse to pass me over a syringe, mixing needle n subcutaneous needle. It's an interchangeable syringe.... So I'm a happy woman. She asked me how many would I want... Of couse sitting back in my fridge is one set of menosys...So i took one.
Update: I feel calmer for my menosys injection last night. The syringe really help. The powder dissolve throughout compared to the day before. I think some of the liquid left in the bottle and i did not get the right dosage as intended.
Written Date: 3/4/2012
Emotional Rollercoaster
I pray hard this IVF would work... Why?
1. I really wanted more children.
2. I paid loads for this treatment.
3. I could not focus on work at the moment as kept thinking about the treatment plus emotionally unstable due to tons of drugs circulating in my body.
4. I need to go and see the doctor and undergo process that i despise....
5. Who likes injection... Frequent and daily injection
6. I have hope in my heart and the desire keep pressing me.
So when i get setback like hiding and inaccessible ovary.... of course i'm depressed. Top it of with six follicles on the left ovary with variable sizes... I worried... worried a lot. What if... No eggs in the follicles.. what if the eggs immature... what if no fertilization.....
1. I really wanted more children.
2. I paid loads for this treatment.
3. I could not focus on work at the moment as kept thinking about the treatment plus emotionally unstable due to tons of drugs circulating in my body.
4. I need to go and see the doctor and undergo process that i despise....
5. Who likes injection... Frequent and daily injection
6. I have hope in my heart and the desire keep pressing me.
So when i get setback like hiding and inaccessible ovary.... of course i'm depressed. Top it of with six follicles on the left ovary with variable sizes... I worried... worried a lot. What if... No eggs in the follicles.. what if the eggs immature... what if no fertilization.....
Written Date 2/4/2012
Stim Day 8.... So Far Not So Good
I started to feel dull ache feeling on my right side of pelvis. It should be a good sign right? My ovary is growing nicely with beautiful follicles. Well i was told to see Dr Tee on 2/4/2012 at Subang Branch. I was having positive vibes all along. Despite having been poorly the whole week of stimming, I've got fever and runny nose. It was bad continued with non stop cough since thursday. I've taken in lots of medication hoping all the pain will go away. I've taken paracetamol, actifed, antibiotic, prednisolone, cetrizine and two other cough medicine prescribed by GP. I also mentioned give me something that is IVF friendly please.
Monday mid day i leave early from my office, had lunch and arrived at the clinic at 2:15. The nurse let me know Dr Tee is running a bit late. Usually he comes at 2:30, so I say i'll wait. Well... I have to wait don't i... I can't just be running around to other Dr to scan me, do I?
Around 3pm, Dr arrived and i get to see him around 3:15 as i'm the second patient in line. First question from the Dr "Have you got your menses?"...... WTF... You can't remember what stage I am and don't you capture something in my file? So I told Dr Tee I've stimming 7 days already and to see the progress... Right... Let have a vaginal scan... Wohooo yeah... Any normal person likes her V to be poke around? Haahaha I was so excited to see how many follies I have.
So Dr Tee explained... My uterine is about 11mm thick... Hmmmm luscious... He explained the utering is moving around like velvet sponge waiting for embryo to implant.... Yeay...
On to my left ovary, he could see around 6 follies with the most dominant 23mm X 16 mm and other smaller sizes. Moving to my right ovary........ Poke around, I started to feel bit uncomfortable... AND.... no follicles on my right ovary... he could not find my right ovary... He said not to worry, maybe during retrieval when I'm fully sedated he could find my right ovary. I'm pretty pissed off. Last IVF, they could only managed to retrieve from one ovary and ended up with zero fertilisation.
He was not happy with my response. He could not remember my gonal f dose. Dr darl... you are supposed to jot down everything about me in my file.
I was given menosys (similar to Menopur HMG (Human Menopausal Gonadotropin)). 2 sets of 75 iu. One for tonight and tomorrow. Will see Dr Tee again on Wednesday 4/4/2012. Today Nurul the embryologist is not around, leaving me with another lady to explain to me about the medication. She has problem speaking malay. well somehow I could manage to understand the instruction.
It's consist of two ampoules. You need to break the glass. I'm a bit nervous about that. since my previous encounter with this sort of bottle, I managed to break the glass and cut my fingers. Browse through the google found some cool tips on how to break the glass. Easy peasy though my hands were shaking throughout the process.
Main problem... the needle was to short to draw the drug. WTF.... I know something wrong here. They should have given me a longer needle... After half an hour struggling at the point of panicking and crying I managed to tilt the bottle and have menosys for injection.
Reminder to me... Get a longer needle from the clinic tomorrow.
Monday mid day i leave early from my office, had lunch and arrived at the clinic at 2:15. The nurse let me know Dr Tee is running a bit late. Usually he comes at 2:30, so I say i'll wait. Well... I have to wait don't i... I can't just be running around to other Dr to scan me, do I?
Around 3pm, Dr arrived and i get to see him around 3:15 as i'm the second patient in line. First question from the Dr "Have you got your menses?"...... WTF... You can't remember what stage I am and don't you capture something in my file? So I told Dr Tee I've stimming 7 days already and to see the progress... Right... Let have a vaginal scan... Wohooo yeah... Any normal person likes her V to be poke around? Haahaha I was so excited to see how many follies I have.
So Dr Tee explained... My uterine is about 11mm thick... Hmmmm luscious... He explained the utering is moving around like velvet sponge waiting for embryo to implant.... Yeay...
On to my left ovary, he could see around 6 follies with the most dominant 23mm X 16 mm and other smaller sizes. Moving to my right ovary........ Poke around, I started to feel bit uncomfortable... AND.... no follicles on my right ovary... he could not find my right ovary... He said not to worry, maybe during retrieval when I'm fully sedated he could find my right ovary. I'm pretty pissed off. Last IVF, they could only managed to retrieve from one ovary and ended up with zero fertilisation.
He was not happy with my response. He could not remember my gonal f dose. Dr darl... you are supposed to jot down everything about me in my file.
I was given menosys (similar to Menopur HMG (Human Menopausal Gonadotropin)). 2 sets of 75 iu. One for tonight and tomorrow. Will see Dr Tee again on Wednesday 4/4/2012. Today Nurul the embryologist is not around, leaving me with another lady to explain to me about the medication. She has problem speaking malay. well somehow I could manage to understand the instruction.
It's consist of two ampoules. You need to break the glass. I'm a bit nervous about that. since my previous encounter with this sort of bottle, I managed to break the glass and cut my fingers. Browse through the google found some cool tips on how to break the glass. Easy peasy though my hands were shaking throughout the process.
Main problem... the needle was to short to draw the drug. WTF.... I know something wrong here. They should have given me a longer needle... After half an hour struggling at the point of panicking and crying I managed to tilt the bottle and have menosys for injection.
Reminder to me... Get a longer needle from the clinic tomorrow.
Written Date : 2/4/2012
Been there, done that
Well.... AF came on 23/03/2012 and came to see the Dr on Saturday 24/03/2012. By this time I have been D/R for 3 weeks (CD21 8/3/2012)... Yes I know my cycles are long 35 days but apparently i've been told anything between 26 - 35 days are considered normal.
Waited a while, there's nothing much else to do on saturday morning right other that seating in the waiting area to see Dr Tee. Finally my name was called. We had a scan, everything was ok minus the fibroid 1.2 cm in the uterus. We had a bit complication trying to draw blood being me with little shy vein and all. I was asked to start stimming Monday CD4 26/03/2012. So we waited again in the lounge. Paid the RM6000.00 and waited for the embryologist to see me. After half an hour or so, sat down with Nurul the embryologist. She asked me to stim using 300 iu dose of Gonal F daily.
Gonal f injection pen have 375 iu dose per pen and I have to use it wisely. Meaning if have balance from previous pen, I'll have to inject twice. Ouch.
Let say:
Stim D1: Pen 1 300iu
Stim D2: Pen 1 75 iu + Pen 2 225 iu
She handed me over 8 pen in total.
So now my daily schedule:
Morning 7:30 am : burserelin 20 units / 0.2 ml
Night 8:00 pm : Gonal F 300 iu
Waited a while, there's nothing much else to do on saturday morning right other that seating in the waiting area to see Dr Tee. Finally my name was called. We had a scan, everything was ok minus the fibroid 1.2 cm in the uterus. We had a bit complication trying to draw blood being me with little shy vein and all. I was asked to start stimming Monday CD4 26/03/2012. So we waited again in the lounge. Paid the RM6000.00 and waited for the embryologist to see me. After half an hour or so, sat down with Nurul the embryologist. She asked me to stim using 300 iu dose of Gonal F daily.
Gonal f injection pen have 375 iu dose per pen and I have to use it wisely. Meaning if have balance from previous pen, I'll have to inject twice. Ouch.
Let say:
Stim D1: Pen 1 300iu
Stim D2: Pen 1 75 iu + Pen 2 225 iu
She handed me over 8 pen in total.
So now my daily schedule:
Morning 7:30 am : burserelin 20 units / 0.2 ml
Night 8:00 pm : Gonal F 300 iu
Written Date: 2/4/2012
IVF No 4
Well here I am again... In IVF rollercoaster. I'm 36 and going to be 37 this April. I feel this would be my last attempt to have another baby/babies.
I'm staying in another state and i could not consider going back to the centre before.
I've been looking into few places/centres. My criterias:
1. Cost
2. Distance
3. Doctor Reputation
I've decided to go for Metro IVF. They have a package 1 IVF cycle is RM12800 (below 35 years). For each additional year RM 300.00. I have to pay RM 13,100.00 in full.
First visit when I booked I have to pay RM2000.00. Another RM2000.00 when I start down regulating. RM6000.00 CD 2 Scan and blood work. RM 3100.00 during ER.
During first appointment I was to told during u/sound that I have 1.2cm fibroid in my uterus. Doctor was not concerned as the size is small.
DH SA came back, count was 40 million but Dr is more concerned on quality.
Came in on 8 March 2012 (CD21) for a scan and suprefact. 0.2ml every morning at 7:30.
I'm staying in another state and i could not consider going back to the centre before.
I've been looking into few places/centres. My criterias:
1. Cost
2. Distance
3. Doctor Reputation
I've decided to go for Metro IVF. They have a package 1 IVF cycle is RM12800 (below 35 years). For each additional year RM 300.00. I have to pay RM 13,100.00 in full.
First visit when I booked I have to pay RM2000.00. Another RM2000.00 when I start down regulating. RM6000.00 CD 2 Scan and blood work. RM 3100.00 during ER.
During first appointment I was to told during u/sound that I have 1.2cm fibroid in my uterus. Doctor was not concerned as the size is small.
DH SA came back, count was 40 million but Dr is more concerned on quality.
Came in on 8 March 2012 (CD21) for a scan and suprefact. 0.2ml every morning at 7:30.
Written Date 26/3/2012
IVF No 3
In November 2009 I went for another cycle of IVF. 15 eggs retrieved and 0 fertilized. I was gutted. Nobody could explain what happen. I was told by the embryologist the eggs and quality was good and they were puzzled why none fertilized.
I was traumatized, it's not something cheap and to have it done again.... I need to regrouped with DH and think this through. I'm moving to another branch, the work are hectic. I don't know if I have the time, energy and money to do it again
I was traumatized, it's not something cheap and to have it done again.... I need to regrouped with DH and think this through. I'm moving to another branch, the work are hectic. I don't know if I have the time, energy and money to do it again
Written Date: 26/3/2012
IVF No 2
I've been a meaning to have another go on IVF so DS can have sibling. I could not do it in 2006 as I undergo lapcholestomy. Early 2007 I went for another cycle of IVF in Melaka, the same centre where I had my ICSI which resulted a BFN.
This time around I managed to have 16 eggs retrieved and 3 fertilised. It was transferred day 3, 2 embryo 8 cells and 1 embryo 7 cells.
BFP. DD was born on 9 December 2007. Fully breastfeed her till 1 yo and continue BF and formula till she is 3 yo
This time around I managed to have 16 eggs retrieved and 3 fertilised. It was transferred day 3, 2 embryo 8 cells and 1 embryo 7 cells.
BFP. DD was born on 9 December 2007. Fully breastfeed her till 1 yo and continue BF and formula till she is 3 yo
Written Date :26/3/2012
IVF NO 1
DH continue his PHD in Sheffield which I accompany him. I've started again asking around and met my GP. Told about my history and he referred me to Sheffield Hospital. I've to wait 4 months before I could get a HSG appointment as they do the procedure on day 10 and it must on thursday. Blood work done. Finally we get to see a doctor. We were told it is impossible for me to be pregnant. I've asked the doctor to refer me to the fertility centre.
So off we go to Assisted Conception Unit (ACU) I was given option either to do it free but the waiting list is 2 years to privately funded (immediately). So we opted immediately of course. The cost for it is 2100 pound. The doctor tested DH sperm and informed we can have IVF. We were later asked when do we want to start our treatment. Hmmm it's a dilemma, I was doing my full time MSc and working part time. So I choose early 2004 as I've just finished my exam and could concentrate on the treatment.
ACU managed to retrieved 8 eggs. The doctor was quite surprise as I have less than 10 eggs considering my age ( I was 29) I remembered doctor was commenting after ET we might use different regiment if this cycle does not work.
Day 2 I was informed by ACU the have 2 eggs fertilised and they were good quality embryo. Transferred day 2, 2 embryo 4 cells.
BFP. DS was born on 13 December 2004. 3.14kg. Breastfeed him till he is 1 yo
Written Date 26/3/2012
So off we go to Assisted Conception Unit (ACU) I was given option either to do it free but the waiting list is 2 years to privately funded (immediately). So we opted immediately of course. The cost for it is 2100 pound. The doctor tested DH sperm and informed we can have IVF. We were later asked when do we want to start our treatment. Hmmm it's a dilemma, I was doing my full time MSc and working part time. So I choose early 2004 as I've just finished my exam and could concentrate on the treatment.
ACU managed to retrieved 8 eggs. The doctor was quite surprise as I have less than 10 eggs considering my age ( I was 29) I remembered doctor was commenting after ET we might use different regiment if this cycle does not work.
Day 2 I was informed by ACU the have 2 eggs fertilised and they were good quality embryo. Transferred day 2, 2 embryo 4 cells.
BFP. DS was born on 13 December 2004. 3.14kg. Breastfeed him till he is 1 yo
First Step
As I'm embarking another IVF journey, i feel the need for me to write a diary. I could refer to it again and review how it goes or somebody out there could refer to my fertile challenge.
I'm not new to infertility and been fighting it since year 2000.
I've done few cycles of clomid then proceeds to IUI w/ clomid and IUI w/ puregon
In 2001 I undergo a laporatomy which to remove cysts in my ovary and repositioning my uterus (mine was retrovert) I did not know that at that time it is simply impossible to do that.
I always suspected I have PCOS as I have a very long cycle, sometimes irregular, i'm overweight and quite hairy on the chin plus acne.
DH has MFI his sperm count is always less than 20 million.
Early 2002 we went through an ICSI cycle. We have 2 embryos transferred back. BFN. AF even arrived before the test.
I'm not new to infertility and been fighting it since year 2000.
I've done few cycles of clomid then proceeds to IUI w/ clomid and IUI w/ puregon
In 2001 I undergo a laporatomy which to remove cysts in my ovary and repositioning my uterus (mine was retrovert) I did not know that at that time it is simply impossible to do that.
I always suspected I have PCOS as I have a very long cycle, sometimes irregular, i'm overweight and quite hairy on the chin plus acne.
DH has MFI his sperm count is always less than 20 million.
Early 2002 we went through an ICSI cycle. We have 2 embryos transferred back. BFN. AF even arrived before the test.
Written Date 26/3/2012
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